As a caregiver, there were times when the worry and the stress of wondering whether I was doing everything I could for my son reached a point where the floodgates would open and the tears flowed. I felt that I was failing when I didn't seem to be able to "hold it together" and be strong as I should be. I knew somehow that there was a cleansing benefit to just "having a good cry" but I didn't see it explained so well as when I received my "weekly affirmation" email from the Cancer Crusade a few days ago. It seems the researchers at the University of Minnesota, studying the chemical composition of emotionally tears found that crying seems to be a healthy and very appropriate response to stress creating an endorphin which is a natural pain reliever in the brain. To read the whole text, just go to:

http://webpages.charter.net/xila/tears.html

Anne-Marie,

Worry that the tears don't come.
Have not had a good cry since this whole journey started. Feel like it is welled up, hiding and will be a deluge.
Want to have a throw myself on the floor, kicking, screaming good old fashioned blubbering tantrum but it won't come.
It's there and when it comes it will be a real deluge.

Thank you for posting the link
Maggie

I agree thattears are good for you. The main ones I had were right after surgery when my whole family and BarbT came into the room. They had tears and I think i'm one tough guy, but I am a sensitive guy too.. We all had tears and mine were from seeing them cry over this old guy. My 3 and 7 grandkids, Barb and her daughter,, It's a wonder the floor wasn't soaked. LOL.. I'll never forget that day.It was similar to the Abdominal Aoric Anneurysm surgery when I had family waiting after 2 days of a respirator. Go ahead and make those tears flow all.

Seems like there are different things/situations/people that can trigger the tears. For me, sometimes, as Jim said, it was seeing someone else welling up with tears, or even the memory of my son as he came out of surgery with all the tubes coming out of him. Or it's someone being kind and just asking how I was that started the tears and I had to hurry up and say something positive so they wouldn't feel sorry for me and have to see my tears. I felt I had to be strong and put up a front so I could do what needed to be done. But at home, alone, in the dark - the tears did come. And it helped.

Anne-Marie,
I received that just the other day and shared it with mom right away...I think it made her feel better. Great article for all to read.
Thanks for all of your support the last few days.
Love,
Donna