Thank you! We need all the prayers we can get. My Mom's doctor hasn't discussed chemotherapy and radiation with her yet. I think he wanted to wait till after the surgery. He did mention at the beginning that if the cancer had not spread very much he wanted to avoid doing it at first. Not sure, will find out.

Loving Daughter,

I am so sorry to hear of your mother's diagnosis. It's very hard news to take. I wish for her (and your family) that she has a good prognosis.

Being pregnant is indeed a stressful time, in of itself. I'm glad to hear that your preterm labor was halted. Keep that little one in there as long as possible! I was pregnant when I was diagnosed and treated for OC. I have the fortune of living in greater Boston, as well, where we have plenty of top-notch facilities to chose from.

Please be sure to get all of the physical and emotional support that you need, especially now. Pregnancy is a time when you should be dreaming of the wonderful things that motherhood will bring. Please try to keep your mind on track, as I know that you are nearly there! This is not an easy task, I know.

If your parents are having difficulty getting support, things will be challenging during her post-operative recovery and then radiation, chemo, or whatever they decide on for a treatment plan. Your parents will need all the help they can get. I made a list of contact of people who were willing/able to help. I gave them to my husband so he could keep everyone updated, when I was unable. Also, one of my friends used a support system website for me...she acted as the administrator. Basically, the patient/family in need of help lists their needs...anything from rides to/from doctor appointments to grocery shopping/housekeeping. I even posted needs for playdates for my toddler daughter.

The website is called http://www.lotsahelpinghands.com/

I live northwest of Boston. I'm not sure whre your parents live, but if I am able, I may be able to offer some support. If you need anything, feel free to send me a private message (PM).

I wish you the best of luck on your upcoming delivery as you welcome your new baby into this world!

Take good care,
Kerri

Frankly I would push for rads and chemo - if it's in a node - I would want to have it done. I know some drs take the wait and see method, but ideally you hit it as hard as you can first time out... If you give it a chance to spread it will - and microscopic cancer in the other nodes isn't visible on scans. Chemo and rads is designed to get any strays. Hugs and good luck.

LD,
As you know, my mom had the same doctor as yours and he didn't discuss treatment until after surgery with her either. He wanted to see what the lymph node involvement was first. He was pretty sure she would be having radiation to her head and neck, but the lymph node involvement would determine if she needed chemo with it... which she did. I trust he will make the right decision for your mom. I do agree with the others here though, as much as chemo/rad sucks, it is worth it to decrease chance of recurrance. As mentioned earlier in this thread, she will recover from the surgery surprisingly quickly. I watched my mom improve leaps and bounds each day, was amazing to see her walk out of the hospital 8 days after a 10 hour surgery. She is in good hands so I am sure she will do just as well.

I will continue to hope and pray for you and your family!

Katy

What a great daughter you are and what a wonderful mother you will be. All I can add is that since radiation and chemo are possiblities, please insist that your mother's doctors do a basic blood test for her TSH (thyroid levels)so she has a baseline. Without that, her doctors will only be guessing as to what levels she should be after radiation. It's a simple blood test and can even be combined with the ones she has to get anyway. Most oncologists do not do the TSH test until after the radiation when it is too late and basically worthless.
Charm

I hope your moms surgery went well today. Keep us updated.

Hi Everyone!

Thank you all for your kind words and advice, we appreciate it very much. My Mom was just released from the hospital today, only 3 days after surgery! So proud of her and happy she seems to be recovering so well. It was not as bad as originally first thought, so the doctor was able to remove the tumor from her tongue and it resected upon itself. They also removed the cancerous lymph node from her neck and surrounding ones to test. I think the surgery was around 5 hours and she did great. She was very talkative on the phone and I could understand every word she spoke. She slurs a little bit, but that is to be expected. She said it is very painful though and is trying to stay positive through the amount of pain she's in. She is also upset because the side of her face is drooping from the lymph node removal, and she wants to know when that will improve? I told her to just give it time, and she will heal. I am just so happy she made it through the surgery successfully and seems to be doing better.

I believe Dr. Jalisi did discuss treatment options with my Dad. I didn't ask my Mom, but I'm sure he discussed it with her as well. We plan on following whatever treatment options are the best for her at this point in time.

Kerri-Thanks for sharing your story. I can't even imagine what it must have been like to be diagnosed with cancer while pregnant. I am so happy you got through it and had your beautiful baby boy. I'm expecting a boy too

Amy-My Mom LOVES Dr. Jalisi! She just raves about him. He did a tremendous job on her surgery and I'm so happy that he's taking care of her.

I will continue to keep you all updated when I can. I'm so happy to be here on this board and you all have been such a great help for me during this most difficult time. I hope all of you are doing well and I look forward to talking with you soon.

Katy

SOOOOOOOO glad to hear how well your mom is doing! To go home just 3 days post surgery is amazing! Even though she is experiencing some pain that is only temporary and manageable and her positive attitude will take her so far.

I'm so relieved for you that you can relax a little bit.

Fingers crossed all the other lymph nodes come back negative! <3

Katy,

I am so very happy to hear that all is going well with your Mom. She must be one tough cookie! It sounds like she is a fighter .

It's so exciting to be expecting a baby boy! Either one, of course, is exciting! When is your due date? Were you able to have a baby shower yet?

My sister was also pregnant with her first child when I was diagnosed and treated. My niece is exactly one month older than my son. I was planning her baby shower and had already sent out invitations, got favors...the whole bit...when the bomb dropped. I got released from the hospital the day she was supposed to have her shower. She refused to have it without me and I still feel heartbroken about that. I will certainly be planning a shower for her second baby when the time comes!

I hope you are feeling well. Please keep us posted as you are able!

Hugs,
Kerri

Yeah! So glad your mom is feeling better!!! And did well - the droop may be nerve damage or just swelling from lymphedema - hopefully she will recover quickly. I didn't droop so maybe someone here will jump in to give you more info. HUgs an blessings to you all.