| Joined: Mar 2008 Posts: 3,082 Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) | OP Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) Joined: Mar 2008 Posts: 3,082 | As the Holiday (or Holy Days) approach, it can be hard on us. The emphasis on food and parties can be depressing for those of us who can't eat or have swallowing difficulties. The weariness of radiation that lingers on after the treatments are done doesn't help either. I was struck by this headline on an article in my local Catholic newspaper. While I object to the tyranny of positive thinking, the author's little story made its point to me [quote]In 1953, I was in the US Army, a military police officer walking guard duty at midnight on Christmas Eve. There I was, a lonely draftee serving at Fort Sam Houston in San Antonio. My civilian life seemed a million miles away, I could actually hear the choir singing Christmas carols at the post chapel where midnight Mass was being held. I felt terribly alone. It never dawned on me that night that I was giving in to self pity. Indulging my negative feelings kept me from realizing the wonderful opportunity I was given. It would have been so much better had I sung along with the choir.... the gift of joy never descends on those who think they are a poor helpless creature.[/quote] Just a reminder that we can cope with the Holiday spirit even when our spirits are low. Charm 65 yr Old Frack Stage IV BOT T3N2M0 HPV 16+ 2007:72GY IMRT(40) 8 ERBITUX No PEG 2008:CANCER BACK Salvage Surgery 25GY-CyberKnife(5) 3 Carboplatin Apaghia /G button 2012: CANCER BACK -left tonsilar fossa 40GY-CyberKnife(5) 3 Carboplatin Passed away 4-29-13
| | | | Joined: Nov 2009 Posts: 92 Supporting Member (50+ posts) | Supporting Member (50+ posts) Joined: Nov 2009 Posts: 92 | Charm,
Thanks for that story - I needed it. Thanksgiving hit during my "rough patch" of round 1 induction chemo. I realized IC is nothing compared to chemo-rads, but still felt sorry for myself for feeling sick, and feeling the need to act like I felt better than I did. Truth is, I was with people I love, and was able to eat a few things (hooray, overcooked veggies and gravy) and the pain meds that helped me eat only made me tired, didn't knock me out. I had to do an attitude check a couple of times.
Here's to all of us singing along . . .
44 at 10-26-2009 Dx; SCC, T2N2b, St.IV BOT; Rt. Tonsil out; PET 11-12-09 (3 spots); 3 rds Cisplatin, Taxotere and 5-FU started 11-19-09; PEG 12-24-09; 7 wks chemo-rads done 03-16-10. 06-28 CT/PET watching 1 node; PEG out; 11-15 CT - larger; 11-23 PET activity up; mrdc 12-21; 04-01-11 CLEAN SCANS! ; March 2018 new SCC - Meet with surgeon 4-4-18
| | | | Joined: Dec 2008 Posts: 1,004 Patient Advocate (1000+ posts) | Patient Advocate (1000+ posts) Joined: Dec 2008 Posts: 1,004 | We all have to do an attitide check sometimes....don't we? lol
Suzanne *********** T1 SCC on right side of tongue Age 31...27 when diagnosed 4 partial glossectomies No chemo or radiation Biopsy on 2/2/10-Clear Surgery needed again...no later than April 2011 Loving life and just became a mother on 11/25/10 It's not what we CAN'T do..it's what we CAN do:)
| | | | Joined: Mar 2008 Posts: 3,082 Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) | OP Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) Joined: Mar 2008 Posts: 3,082 | Let me make it clear that this post was aimed at myself, and not any poster here on OCF. I would not want to discourage anyone from venting their frustrations, anger and fear. I had to rewrite our family Christmas letter as it just reeked of self pity. I ended up noting the eerily appropriateness of my GPS' "Recalculating' when I deviated from the directions. We are "Recalculating" the course of our lives. It's a different road then we had planned, but it is still an adventure. Charm
65 yr Old Frack Stage IV BOT T3N2M0 HPV 16+ 2007:72GY IMRT(40) 8 ERBITUX No PEG 2008:CANCER BACK Salvage Surgery 25GY-CyberKnife(5) 3 Carboplatin Apaghia /G button 2012: CANCER BACK -left tonsilar fossa 40GY-CyberKnife(5) 3 Carboplatin Passed away 4-29-13
| | | | Joined: Feb 2007 Posts: 1,940 "OCF across the pond" Patient Advocate (1000+ posts) | "OCF across the pond" Patient Advocate (1000+ posts) Joined: Feb 2007 Posts: 1,940 | well i for one can do without the holiday spirit.All it means to me is a day to day reminder,from first hospital visit on the 8th december through to FNA,biopsy,laser dissection,results,MDT meeting,body scan the most miserable christmas ever hundreds of miles from my family alone while rob was in bed for 3pm unable to eat or drink with the secondary tumour pressing on his windpipe.Holiday spirit? Bah humbug i hate christmas.Self pity?damn right and damn cancer
Last edited by Cookey; 12-07-2009 09:46 AM.
Liz in the UK
Husband Robin aged 44 years Dx 8th Dec 2006 poorly differentiated SCC tongue with met to neck T1N2cM0 Surgery and Radiation.Finished TX April 2007 Recurrence June/07 died July 29th/07.
Never take your eye off the ball, it may just smack you in the mouth.
| | | | Joined: Jun 2007 Posts: 595 "Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts) | "Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts) Joined: Jun 2007 Posts: 595 | You have every right to vent and here is a good place to do it, all we can do is our best and I try to remember that there are many here who have had a more difficult time then I had!!! Semper-Fi Bob
Bob age 57, non smoker,non drinker, ended treatment on 11 Nov 2007 and started back to work on 29 Nov 2007. Veterans Day 2012 the Battle was lowered, folded, Taps was played and the Flag buried as I am know a 5 year survivor. Semper-FI !!!
| | | | Joined: Feb 2007 Posts: 790 "Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts) | "Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts) Joined: Feb 2007 Posts: 790 | Yes Charm- We understand first hand your pain. You want to eat so badly but you can't- and it just sucks. Everything social revolves around food too. I've been there - not during the holidays - so I can only imagine how much more difficult that must be because the holidays are so food ephasized.... You have my sypathetic ear and empathy for sure 2000%
Wishing you some comfort and joy in some way during this next month.
KATE
Tongue Cancer T2 N0 M0 / Total Glossectomy Due to Location of Tumor
Finished all treatments May 25 2007 Surviving!!!
| | | | Joined: May 2009 Posts: 35 Contributing Member (25+ posts) | Contributing Member (25+ posts) Joined: May 2009 Posts: 35 | This will be my first Christmas after Dx, surgery. As in my signature, I had total glossectomy, with flap permanently anchored to floor of mouth. Even if I have all the will in the world, until I find the right technique, I could not eat/swallow solid food (because I could not control food in my mouth) and therefore have to live on blenderized foods.
So Christmas-wise, that means I have a very limited range of food choices to co-celebrate with family and friends. From where I come from, Christmas season is one of the two most celebrated Holidays (if not the most celebrated Holiday).
I have two choices about my situation: be bitter, or be better. It's my choice how to react and feel during this season: stay at home in a sulk, or celebrate; just like the MP in the quoted story above - indulge in negative feelings or be joyous, too.
I am constantly reminded that "attitude is more important than event". (note: "more important"...so this phrase doesn't belittle the event)
And as I read the actual experiences of posters under various topics of this board, the more I am reminded that I still have a lot to be thankful for.
Diagnosed: 16Feb'09 Pre-op Dx: Tongue SCCA Stage IVB (T4N2cM0) Opn: 2Mar'09. Total glossectomy, Neck dissection (Levels I-V), bilateral; Anterolateral, Thigh flap recon'n; Tracheostomy; PEG Decanullation: 24Mar'09 IMRT x30, concurrent with chemo (cisplatin) x3: May-Jun '09 PEG out: 23Oct'09
| | | | Joined: Sep 2009 Posts: 701 Likes: 1 "Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts) | "Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts) Joined: Sep 2009 Posts: 701 Likes: 1 | Hi Everyone,
I just read this entire thread and it is heartbreaking to me how the holiday focus on foods alienates the OC population.
We have been invited to an annual Christmas dinner that in the past was something we looked forward to. As my husband is recovering from jaw surgery, this is too much of a challenge for him at this time. He is still on a liquid supplement and standing around watching others drink spirits and eat passed hor d'oeuvres would be torturous. The graft on his leg alone makes this difficult not to mention the sutures on his face.
We have decided not to go which is fine with me. However, some of the other friends who are going are still sending notes in their Christmas cards really pushing the event. I know they mean well but part of me feels that they think Clark should be better by now and should want to come just to be with friends. What??
My husband does not feel sorry for himself but he also does not want to put himself in the arena of being the odd man out. We know that in time things will improve. So for now we're laying low.
Maybe there can be a different way to celebrate the holidays that can include those whose eating patterns have changed. I am discovering that food, like alcohol, can be overrated. I mean that in the kindest way. Clark really misses the desire for and the taste of certain foods. I am just trying to find a place for him to feel comfortable regarding food issues.
Peace to all!
Anita
Anita (68) CG to husband, Clark, 79, DX SCC 11/07, T4N0Mx, PEG 1/08, RAD, post rad infection 3/08, HBOT 40 dives, ORN, Surg 11/09 mandibulectomy w/fibular graft. Plastic Surg 4/10, 12/10, 3/11, 10/11, 4/12, 10/12. All PETS clear, PEG out 1/11. 6/11 non union jaw fracture Fractured jaw w/surgery 7/14 Aspiration pneumonia 7/21, 10/22 PEG 7/21 Botox injections
| | | | Joined: Mar 2008 Posts: 3,082 Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) | OP Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) Joined: Mar 2008 Posts: 3,082 | Anita
How I wish my wife and I were still invited to Christmas parties. Even though I cannot eat or drink, I have attended school reunions and anniversary parties where the food and drink were indeed the center of attention. I just whip out my PEG and use a syringe to put some alcohol down the feeding tube (all my doctors agree as long as I bypass my mouth and throat - no harm) While I can respect and understand your husband's reluctance, it's too bad he doesn't post here so I could tell him directly to reconsider. It can do a world of good to reconnect with friends. Plus it would give you a break from caregiving's focus on cancer. Perhaps you can make an appearance - socialize and then leave early. Everyone would understand. As I started off - our problem is that our so called friends treat us like I am dying and shun us. (I know, they weren't really our friends after all). So maybe share this thread with him: life is too short to pass up an opportunity to celebrate with friends who still miss him and you and are eager to see you. The world is not going to adjust to us, we need to adjust to the world. Just my opinion but then I don't mind watching others eat & drink nor do I mind being a stand out in a crowd. (I wore a 13th century Tang Dynasty Chinese warrior silk recreation of the outfit of the Wind character in Flying Daggers to my very staid agency for my retirement party for a ceremony with our office's top Presidential appointee) Charm 65 yr Old Frack Stage IV BOT T3N2M0 HPV 16+ 2007:72GY IMRT(40) 8 ERBITUX No PEG 2008:CANCER BACK Salvage Surgery 25GY-CyberKnife(5) 3 Carboplatin Apaghia /G button 2012: CANCER BACK -left tonsilar fossa 40GY-CyberKnife(5) 3 Carboplatin Passed away 4-29-13
| | | | Joined: Mar 2008 Posts: 3,082 Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) | OP Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) Joined: Mar 2008 Posts: 3,082 | JoJo
Your post gives me the opportunity to add another Nietzsche quote to the OCF mix (I have to keep up with Christine & EricS) [quote]�Out of damp and gloomy days, out of solitude, out of loveless words directed at us, conclusions grow up in us like fungus: one morning they are there, we know not how, and they gaze upon us, morose and gray. Woe to the thinker who is not the gardener but only the soil of the plants that grow in him.�[/quote] Sounds like you are a gardener, weeding out the self-pity. Charm 65 yr Old Frack Stage IV BOT T3N2M0 HPV 16+ 2007:72GY IMRT(40) 8 ERBITUX No PEG 2008:CANCER BACK Salvage Surgery 25GY-CyberKnife(5) 3 Carboplatin Apaghia /G button 2012: CANCER BACK -left tonsilar fossa 40GY-CyberKnife(5) 3 Carboplatin Passed away 4-29-13
| | | | Joined: Sep 2009 Posts: 701 Likes: 1 "Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts) | "Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts) Joined: Sep 2009 Posts: 701 Likes: 1 | Charm,
Your reply is beautiful. I got teary eyed reading it and at the end I laughed out loud. Thanks for your heartfelt words. You gave me a lot to think about.
Much of my husband's reluctance in participating outside of our home right now is based on his lack of energy, level of pain and this persistent infection. He gets so wiped out. Right now he is napping--we were out for about an hour this morning.
You are so right that our connections with friends are so important. We have had a few folks stop by for visits. And we will be celebrating Christmas with family.
As a caregiver, I have to push myself sometimes to get out and away from this stuff even for an hour at a time. And I do feel guilty that I CAN escape from it when he can't. I love him so much and I want to spend as much time as I can with him.
It's all a tricky balance. Did anyone take a picture of you in your Tang Chinese warrior outfit? Thanks so much--you made my day!
Anita
Anita (68) CG to husband, Clark, 79, DX SCC 11/07, T4N0Mx, PEG 1/08, RAD, post rad infection 3/08, HBOT 40 dives, ORN, Surg 11/09 mandibulectomy w/fibular graft. Plastic Surg 4/10, 12/10, 3/11, 10/11, 4/12, 10/12. All PETS clear, PEG out 1/11. 6/11 non union jaw fracture Fractured jaw w/surgery 7/14 Aspiration pneumonia 7/21, 10/22 PEG 7/21 Botox injections
| | | | Joined: Mar 2008 Posts: 3,082 Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) | OP Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) Joined: Mar 2008 Posts: 3,082 | Anita How very nice of you. I must confess that I have worn that outfit not only to my retirement ceremony but also to my 40th High School Reunion - since the invitation said "dressy casual" as well as to the American Society of Mosaic Artist's ball. I was the only gentleman at all of these events with a long flowing silk gown and brocade vest. I do not cut as dashing a figure as the movie star shown here - just scroll down past the disney ad: Tang Dynasty costume but you can get the effect. Charm 65 yr Old Frack Stage IV BOT T3N2M0 HPV 16+ 2007:72GY IMRT(40) 8 ERBITUX No PEG 2008:CANCER BACK Salvage Surgery 25GY-CyberKnife(5) 3 Carboplatin Apaghia /G button 2012: CANCER BACK -left tonsilar fossa 40GY-CyberKnife(5) 3 Carboplatin Passed away 4-29-13
| | | | Joined: Mar 2008 Posts: 3,082 Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) | OP Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) Joined: Mar 2008 Posts: 3,082 | Anita
I forgot to add how much I can relate to how your husband feels. The song by Snow Patrol : Chasing Cars not only has evocative lyrics but an appropriate tone of what this period is like. Every-time it comes on the radio, my caregiver wife and I tear up. It was on during the worse period of TX for me as I lay on the couch seemingly forever [quote]We'll do it all Everything On our own
We don't need Anything Or anyone
If I lay here If I just lay here Would you lie with me and just forget the world?
I don't quite know How to say How I feel[/quote] 65 yr Old Frack Stage IV BOT T3N2M0 HPV 16+ 2007:72GY IMRT(40) 8 ERBITUX No PEG 2008:CANCER BACK Salvage Surgery 25GY-CyberKnife(5) 3 Carboplatin Apaghia /G button 2012: CANCER BACK -left tonsilar fossa 40GY-CyberKnife(5) 3 Carboplatin Passed away 4-29-13
| | | | Joined: Feb 2007 Posts: 790 "Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts) | "Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts) Joined: Feb 2007 Posts: 790 | I love this song but never knew the lyrics. thank you. Charm- I'm so happy that you are still the life of the party
Tongue Cancer T2 N0 M0 / Total Glossectomy Due to Location of Tumor
Finished all treatments May 25 2007 Surviving!!!
| | | | Joined: Mar 2008 Posts: 3,082 Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) | OP Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) Joined: Mar 2008 Posts: 3,082 | The news of Stephanie's death puts this thread into perspective. When I was alone at night in the hospital and posting here at OCF after the surgery, she was the first one to answer me. Now she is gone. In looking back at the archives, I see that the second person to answer me on that thread was Patty -( Good 1)who also has left us. That makes two out of the only three people who comforted me that night taken by this disease. There was a little ditty in the paper the other day that went something like this: [quote]Christmas Season draws near, not much reason for cheer, but at least I'm still here[/quote] I need to remember that. Charm 65 yr Old Frack Stage IV BOT T3N2M0 HPV 16+ 2007:72GY IMRT(40) 8 ERBITUX No PEG 2008:CANCER BACK Salvage Surgery 25GY-CyberKnife(5) 3 Carboplatin Apaghia /G button 2012: CANCER BACK -left tonsilar fossa 40GY-CyberKnife(5) 3 Carboplatin Passed away 4-29-13
| | | | Joined: Feb 2007 Posts: 1,940 "OCF across the pond" Patient Advocate (1000+ posts) | "OCF across the pond" Patient Advocate (1000+ posts) Joined: Feb 2007 Posts: 1,940 | We all need to remember that Charm ,especially those of us consumed with self pity at what our lives have become thanks to Cancer.Stephanie was so young and had so much to look forward to its tragic and unfair and downright SUCKS. On Sunday i went to the hospice Light Up A Life service in memory of loved ones lost and a 16 year old with an amazing voice sang Run by Snow Patrol.The words were haunting
"Run"
I'll sing it one last time for you Then we really have to go You've been the only thing that's right In all I've done
And I can barely look at you But every single time I do I know we'll make it anywhere Away from here
Light up, light up As if you have a choice Even if you cannot hear my voice I'll be right beside you dear
Louder louder And we'll run for our lives I can hardly speak I understand Why you can't raise your voice to say
To think I might not see those eyes Makes it so hard not to cry And as we say our long goodbye I nearly do
Have heart my dear We're bound to be afraid Even if it's just for a few days Making up for all this mess
Last edited by Cookey; 12-16-2009 08:37 AM.
Liz in the UK
Husband Robin aged 44 years Dx 8th Dec 2006 poorly differentiated SCC tongue with met to neck T1N2cM0 Surgery and Radiation.Finished TX April 2007 Recurrence June/07 died July 29th/07.
Never take your eye off the ball, it may just smack you in the mouth.
| | | | Joined: Mar 2008 Posts: 3,082 Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) | OP Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) Joined: Mar 2008 Posts: 3,082 | Liz
All too true and well said. Since we are on a Snow Patrol roll, here are the entire lyrics to Chasing Cars for MissKate
[quote] "Chasing Cars"
We'll do it all Everything On our own
We don't need Anything Or anyone
If I lay here If I just lay here Would you lie with me and just forget the world?
I don't quite know How to say How I feel
Those three words Are said too much They're not enough
If I lay here If I just lay here Would you lie with me and just forget the world?
Forget what we're told Before we get too old Show me a garden that's bursting into life
Let's waste time Chasing cars Around our heads
I need your grace To remind me To find my own
If I lay here If I just lay here Would you lie with me and just forget the world?
Forget what we're told Before we get too old Show me a garden that's bursting into life
All that I am All that I ever was Is here in your perfect eyes, they're all I can see
I don't know where Confused about how as well Just know that these things will never change for us at all
If I lay here If I just lay here Would you lie with me and just forget the world?
[/quote] 65 yr Old Frack Stage IV BOT T3N2M0 HPV 16+ 2007:72GY IMRT(40) 8 ERBITUX No PEG 2008:CANCER BACK Salvage Surgery 25GY-CyberKnife(5) 3 Carboplatin Apaghia /G button 2012: CANCER BACK -left tonsilar fossa 40GY-CyberKnife(5) 3 Carboplatin Passed away 4-29-13
| | | | Joined: Nov 2009 Posts: 493 Platinum Member (300+ posts) | Platinum Member (300+ posts) Joined: Nov 2009 Posts: 493 | I so much identify with things you all are saying. So much of our social life centers around food. While I am trying to eat more, it takes so long to eat anything! My husband and I went to a party Saturday night, and I was so proud of myself that I ate two meatballs and two pieces of shrimp...then I went home and had my good old Ensure. We are supposed to go to a Christmas party tonight, and I probably won't be able to eat much there, either, but we always have homemade pie, and hopefully someone will have made some cream pies. (Lemon Merangue sounds pretty good.)
Female, nonsmoker, 70, diag. 5/09 after tongue biopsy: stage IV. Left hemi-gloss. and left selec. neck disec. 30 lymph nodes removed May 20. Over 7 weeks daily rads. with three chemo. PEG removed 12/4/09 Am eating mostly soft foods. Back to work 11/09 Retired 4/1/11. 7 clear scans! Port out 9/11. 2/13. It's back: base of tongue, very invasive surgery involving lifestyle changes. 2/14: Now speaking w/Passey-Muir valve. Considering a swallow study. Grateful to be alive.
| | | | Joined: Sep 2006 Posts: 8,311 Senior Patient Advocate Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) | Senior Patient Advocate Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) Joined: Sep 2006 Posts: 8,311 | zengalib,
If you would add a Signature Line we could identify more with your post above. For instance it was a long time post Tx before I a lemon merangue pie would have tasted sweet to me so reading your time line would help me to understand where you are post Tx.
David
Age 58 at Dx, HPV16+ SCC, Stage IV BOT+2 nodes, non smoker, casual drinker, exercise nut, Cisplatin x 3 & concurrent IMRT x 35,(70 Gy), no surgery, no Peg, Tx at Moffitt over Aug 06. Jun 07, back to riding my bike 100 miles a wk. Now doing 12 Spin classes and 60 outdoor miles per wk. Nov 13 completed Hilly Century ride for Cancer, 104 miles, 1st Place in my age group. Apr 2014 & 15, Spun for 9 straight hrs to raise $$ for YMCA's Livestrong Program. Certified Spin Instructor Jun 2014.
| | | | Joined: Nov 2009 Posts: 493 Platinum Member (300+ posts) | Platinum Member (300+ posts) Joined: Nov 2009 Posts: 493 | Actually, there was no lemom merangue, but I had a piece of chocolate cream pie, and that was pretty good, too!
Female, nonsmoker, 70, diag. 5/09 after tongue biopsy: stage IV. Left hemi-gloss. and left selec. neck disec. 30 lymph nodes removed May 20. Over 7 weeks daily rads. with three chemo. PEG removed 12/4/09 Am eating mostly soft foods. Back to work 11/09 Retired 4/1/11. 7 clear scans! Port out 9/11. 2/13. It's back: base of tongue, very invasive surgery involving lifestyle changes. 2/14: Now speaking w/Passey-Muir valve. Considering a swallow study. Grateful to be alive.
| | | | Joined: Jan 2009 Posts: 1,844 Patient Advocate (1000+ posts) | Patient Advocate (1000+ posts) Joined: Jan 2009 Posts: 1,844 | Holiday cheer. The holiday season, what it means to me. Two years ago I was at the height of my success professionally. I had slight jaw pain however professionally and personally I was truly at a peak I had never achieved before.
I had lead a hotel to national prominence and profitability. I had successfully found and added a new hotel project to my companies growing hospitality business. I was making an extremely good living, my family wanted for nothing...but a bit more time from me.
January 2008 I was given my diagnosis, two years later I'm still recovering from what was the fight of my life. During this time I have lost financially everything, a dear friend and business associate, my wife's grandmother and just a few days ago, my sister. All no longer among the living. I share this not to "trump" anyone on loss or situation as there are others with worse situations then mine. I share this to say...i can relate.
I still listen to a song that get's me every time...Defying Gravity from the cast of Glee.
Something has changed within me Something is not the same I'm through with playing by the rules Of someone else's game Too late for second-guessing Too late to go back to sleep It's time to trust my instincts Close my eyes: and leap!
It's time to try Defying gravity I think I'll try Defying gravity Kiss me goodbye I am defying gravity And you wont bring me down!
I'm through accepting limits ''cause someone says they're so Some things I cannot change But till I try, I'll never know! Too long I've been afraid of Losing love I guess I've lost Well, if that's love It comes at much too high a cost!
I'd sooner buy Defying gravity Kiss me goodbye I'm defying gravity I think I'll try Defying gravity And you wont bring me down!
To me, no matter how I've changed physically, my spirit still is one of defiance to this disease and to triumph over adversity, no matter what.
Young Frack, SCC T4N2M0, Cisplatin,35+ rads,ND, RT Mandiblectomy w fibular free flap, facial paralysis, "He who has a "why" to live can bear with almost any "how"." -Nietzche "WARNING" PG-13 due to Sarcasm & WAY too much attitude, interact at your own risk.
| | | | Joined: Mar 2008 Posts: 3,082 Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) | OP Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) Joined: Mar 2008 Posts: 3,082 | Eric
Great attitude and showing a lot of Holiday Spirit. Guess I should have subtitled this thread inspirational sing a long considering how my replies and others have skewed to songs. HO HO HO - perfect timing as in the DC area we are expecting 7 to 12 inches of Snow tomorrow and with the subfreezing temperatures, we should have a White Christmas. Charm 65 yr Old Frack Stage IV BOT T3N2M0 HPV 16+ 2007:72GY IMRT(40) 8 ERBITUX No PEG 2008:CANCER BACK Salvage Surgery 25GY-CyberKnife(5) 3 Carboplatin Apaghia /G button 2012: CANCER BACK -left tonsilar fossa 40GY-CyberKnife(5) 3 Carboplatin Passed away 4-29-13
| | | | Joined: Feb 2007 Posts: 1,940 "OCF across the pond" Patient Advocate (1000+ posts) | "OCF across the pond" Patient Advocate (1000+ posts) Joined: Feb 2007 Posts: 1,940 | We have the snow charm,about 6-8 inches and a walk with the dog has lifted my miserable spirits no end lol.Now its hot chocolate in front of the fire Brrrrr
Liz in the UK
Husband Robin aged 44 years Dx 8th Dec 2006 poorly differentiated SCC tongue with met to neck T1N2cM0 Surgery and Radiation.Finished TX April 2007 Recurrence June/07 died July 29th/07.
Never take your eye off the ball, it may just smack you in the mouth.
| | | | Joined: Nov 2009 Posts: 92 Supporting Member (50+ posts) | Supporting Member (50+ posts) Joined: Nov 2009 Posts: 92 | Love it, Eric - Viva defiance!
44 at 10-26-2009 Dx; SCC, T2N2b, St.IV BOT; Rt. Tonsil out; PET 11-12-09 (3 spots); 3 rds Cisplatin, Taxotere and 5-FU started 11-19-09; PEG 12-24-09; 7 wks chemo-rads done 03-16-10. 06-28 CT/PET watching 1 node; PEG out; 11-15 CT - larger; 11-23 PET activity up; mrdc 12-21; 04-01-11 CLEAN SCANS! ; March 2018 new SCC - Meet with surgeon 4-4-18
| | | | Joined: May 2006 Posts: 720 Likes: 1 "Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts) | "Above & Beyond" Member (500+ posts) Joined: May 2006 Posts: 720 Likes: 1 | Just to give credit where credit is due: The song "Defying Gravity" is from the Broadway musical Wicked. (Great show, if you haven't seen it. It's the story of a free-spirited girl who grew up to become the Wicked Witch of the West in The Wizard of Oz.)
Leslie
April 2006: Husband dx by dentist with leukoplakia on tongue. Oral surgeon's biopsy 4/28/06: Moderate dysplasia; pathology report warned of possible "skip effect." ENT's excisional biopsy (got it all) 5/31/06: SCC in situ/small bit superficially invasive. Early detection saves lives.
| | | | Joined: Mar 2008 Posts: 3,082 Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) | OP Patient Advocate (old timer, 2000 posts) Joined: Mar 2008 Posts: 3,082 | Leslie
Wicked is a Wonderful show. Much much better than the book, which is usually not the case. My wife & I saw it three years ago ( before the Cancer) and it was by far our favorite. Thanks for bringing back happy memories for the holidays. Charm 65 yr Old Frack Stage IV BOT T3N2M0 HPV 16+ 2007:72GY IMRT(40) 8 ERBITUX No PEG 2008:CANCER BACK Salvage Surgery 25GY-CyberKnife(5) 3 Carboplatin Apaghia /G button 2012: CANCER BACK -left tonsilar fossa 40GY-CyberKnife(5) 3 Carboplatin Passed away 4-29-13
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