Marie-Lyne -

You sound like you've really got your hands full.

Your family is going to have a very tough journey in the next few months and it's important for you to remember that you can't do everything for everyone. You've received some great advise here - and I would just add a couple of suggestions.

Like you I am not an active member in a church-family (the why is long story best suited for another website), and our family is scattered as well. Our friends and my co-workers have become my support group. Not because I asked for help - but because they just stepped up and starting helping on their own. The first thing you should do is make sure your boss & co-workers know the situation. My boss is simply the best and allowed me to come and go as needed for Ken's treatments. You never know how people will support you.

The next thing I would do is sit down with the children's teachers and parents of their closest friends. You'll be amazed at how many families have already been touched by cancer (of any kind) and how much support you probably already have available to you.

Allow your friends to help you with chores. It's not that you 'can't' do it - but honestly they just probably want to 'do something' to help. I found this to be true. It was the very simple things that meant the most to me -- someone making dinner for us or cutting the lawn. Don't think you have to shoulder all the work & chores. You don't.

Keep your own sanity. You will be exhausted - mentally and probably physically. Do whatever you have to do to keep yourself healthy and sane. If you don't take care of yourself, you can't take care of your family.

When Ken was diagnosed, a dear friend of mine told me that "faith is a mighty sword". Now, you can take that as a religous comment - or just having faith in yourself and your family. The toughest lesson I learned over the past years is that the 'sword of faith' gets pretty darn heavy at times and you need your friends to help you hang on.

Vent here any time. I am keeping you and your family in my thoughts and prayers.

Hang in there - Carol