This is for all my friends,, I have proposed ,I have almost kissed her rear, given her space, shed tears with her, and things I said I would never do to keep someone. I believed that just walk away and find another. Here is a couple of examples of how things are going..Yesterday morning in church she came and sat with me. We talked about the church Christmas dinner , which is this Saturday. I asked her if I should pay for her and Her Daughter Samatha. I wrote the check and turned it in. Then I was told she might or might not sit with me at the dinner. Hmmmm, not a good thing to say. I asked her how, when someone pays for you to go somewhere, can you not possibly sit with them. This was at the evening service. I have tried everything that i can possibly think of to convince her that after 5 yrs, there has to be some feelings for each other. I even wrote an oathe as to how I would treat her . She has said things about me that noone should say about another person and keeps adding to them to try to convince others as to how bad a guy I am. I proved her wrong on most of it but there is noway she will appologize , say I'm sorry, or I was wrong. If she were a man her teeth would have relocated to back of her head. I even overlook that and forgave her. It seems she will say anything to make her feel she is justifying her leaving. As for the dating, I have invited her to go out for dinner or where ever she wanted. Why does she try to make me look bad to her friends and family? Self justification? My daughter, a critical care nurse and my 300 lb son that competes in the world's strongest man competition from time to time, wanted to come out here and strighten things out. I told them to forget it and not to even think about it. I don't want to cause Barb any embarassement in the town she was raised. That's it in a nutshell. As for other ladies, I have had no problem attracting them , but I am just not interested in anyone else. Thank you all for the advice and I wish I knew why I can still have feelings for her. Jim