I agree with the others. Your presence is what is required. When I found out I had cancer what really kept my spirits up were the people who did not run from it, who were THERE. I have also been there for a number of dying family members...I am here to tell you every one of them APPRECIATED the jokes, and light hearted comments. If they wanted to talk serious, we did that too...I just mostly let them set the pace...and sometimes it was simply sit in the room for them and BE there.