Dear Deneen,
When my father dying of lymphoma, we often shared that we loved each other and I can't stress enough how much of a difference that made during and afterwards. In contrast my mother died suddenly of a massive heart attack and I really didn't get a chance to talk to her. It is important to tell people how you feel while there is still time or you will go through life regreting that you didn't. This really applies to any relationship in life because none of us really know when our death is going to occur.

About treatment. Many times palliative treatment is given to extend life and/or treat some of the painful symptoms (like a tumor pressing on nerves or other organs). It could resemble a full course of radiation and/or chemotherapy but the intent is not to cure the disease, only to mitigate suffering. Of course, it in itself, is a difficult treatment as you know. His cancer probably had never left.

I am not sure what the "energy surge" is that you refer to. Some people want to be there at the exact moment of death to experience the "spirit leaving the body" or a so called light, whatever that is. More often a person just takes a last breath, sighs, and that's it. My mother-in-law was a hospice volunteer worker for many years and that what she shared with me. Some people have related to being very blessed by being there at the exact moment of death, others might be burdened by the sadness of it - it is a very individual thing.


"There is no more urgent and critical question in life than that of your relationship with God and your eternal salvation" (Billy Graham)