Angela

It's not fair, is it? Why did our cancer come back while others are "cured"? We had the same treatments, suffered as much or more, yet we have to have our hopes and dreams dashed one more time. I found this write up at the American Cancer Society to be helpful reading. When your cancer comes back These were the two sections that comforted me the most when my cancer came back:
[quote]Could I have done something to prevent the recurrence?

Although eating right, exercising, and seeing your doctor for follow-up visits are important, please understand that there probably was nothing you could do to keep your cancer from coming back. Many patients blame themselves for missing a doctor visit, not eating right, or putting off a CT scan for a family vacation. But even if you do everything just right, the cancer might still come back.

Sometimes people think taking certain vitamins, herbs, or other dietary supplements will give them an extra edge in preventing recurrence. But the available research does not support this belief. In fact, some research has shown that supplements containing high levels of single nutrients (more than the Dietary Reference Intakes and the tolerable upper intake limits) may have unexpected harmful effects on cancer survivors.

It would be very satisfying to have something we could use to keep cancer from coming back after treatment. We want a real weapon to fight back with -� something that will give us insurance against the cancer coming back. Both doctors and patients wish that there were such a magic potion or formula. But at this time there is nothing you could have done to make sure the cancer would not come back. Even with our current understanding of the process of cancer development and growth, this disease is mostly a mystery and not within human control.
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[quote]What about the �why� questions?
�So many people live the rest of their lives without their cancer coming back! Why me?�

For some people, looking for an answer to the �why� question can cause many sleepless nights and incredible soul searching. Others find that it doesn�t really matter why something has happened � how to best deal with it is more important. Many people think that if they knew why something has happened � and then they can do or stop doing something � somehow the situation will change. While this notion is not usually rational, it helps to understand the way people think. We all look for reasons for what happens in our lives. It is hard to accept that cancer can be a random event and that there may be no answer to why a person develops cancer. Many things can influence the development of cancer � these can be genetic, environmental, or related to something a person did. Most people never know why they have cancer, so trying to find the answer to this question only leads to frustration, sadness, or anger. This is the kind of question that doesn�t help right now. Rather than look for an answer, most people would rather spend their time and energy trying to get better and enjoying time with loved ones.

The bottom line in answering the �why� question is that knowing the answer to the question will not change what happens next. Worrying about �why� can drain people of energy which is better used in coping with the illness. Consider getting some counseling if you find yourself unable to move beyond this question.
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Keep the Faith
Charm