Anne

Welcome to OCF. Im so glad you found this site to help you both get thru this battle. While your husband is going thru treatments, his moods may become more difficult. As a patient, I can sympathize with him. Treatments can be awful and make you feel worse than crap!

As far as his eating goes, what you perceive to be something mental may in fact be sores in his mouth and throat which makes it uncomfortable for him to eat. Doesnt matter what the reason is, it cant go on!!!!! This is something that will land him in the hospital for malnutrition or dehydration. It happened to me and a few others here who werent successful with ingesting their daily requirements.

You mentioned a feeding tube. I have all kinds of ways to get this going and make it work for him. First off, if he has a pump use it to give the feedings overnight. This will take the pressure off for daytime feeding. If he doesnt have a feeding machine...get one asap. He should be getting at least 3000 calories per day to be able to have the strength to fight this. If he is able to eat at all then he should be swallowing something several times per day. If he chooses to not do this, he may lose his ability to swallow and need to relearn this later. He must drink water, minimum 48oz per day.

There is also a tab for caregivers that will help you. If you havent already lined up friends and relatives to help out then start making a list. So many people will say what can I do...now is the time to make a list of them and take them up on it. Even if they do a load of laundry or drive him one day, its a break that you will need. If you dont think there are people to help, call the American Cancer Society, they will help you with providing a driver sometimes or even paying for meds. Having helpers is very important for your own health. If something happens to you, then who will help your husband? Not trying to scare you, it was mentioned in your post. Just making sure you line up some helpers to ease the burden.

Best of luck with everything.